


but we were something, don't you think so?

by stfuhyuck



Category: EXO (Band), NCT (Band), SHINee, SuperM (Korea Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Character Study, Eventual Relationships, Fluff, Getting Together, Happy Ending, M/M, Mutual Pining, Non-Linear Narrative, Pining, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-17 10:14:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29223786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stfuhyuck/pseuds/stfuhyuck
Summary: Baekhyun doesn't think that highly of himself despite what people said but he did know his limits. He never thought of himself as that good of a man either - he's just this and that, a persona of a figure in this idol industry.Fool, that’s what he is.“I can hear you thinking,”A really big fool on that.“Thank you for noticing.”Lee Taemin, he swears to fucking God.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun & Lee Taemin, Byun Baekhyun/Lee Taemin
Comments: 6
Kudos: 34





	but we were something, don't you think so?

**Author's Note:**

> so this came out of my sudden desire to write about baekhyun and taemin while blasting baekhyun's discography at three in the morning. i've been interested in this pairing for a while and this has been sitting in my drafts for months so here it is i guess 
> 
> this is just me projecting my love towards taemin through a taurus that is baekhyun
> 
> i just depends on grammarly so excuse any errors
> 
> enjoy!

  


Nothing much is certain in this industry.

  


Baekhyun learned that the hard way – what’s with the rampaging of fans outside his dorm in his early days, constant notifications from his superior telling him to fix his attitude, continuous criticism of how he should contain himself, and people around him reminding him that he’s trying too hard to fit in. He’s used to everyone watching his every step and every breath he took as they waited for his downfall. They’re always there – always behind his back with their heavy stares and silly smiles as they laughed about that vocalist from the new group with a strange concept. 

  


He’s lived his life off people’s words; might it be compliments or complaints. He’s seen through it all – through his fellow artists’ lives, his acquaintances, the staffs that are barely holding on as they prepare him for another schedule, the lives of his stylist that had an underlying fear of being fired every time their eyes met from the mirror, through his seniors that had the experience before handed. 

  


He couldn’t lie and said that he didn’t try too hard because he sure as hell do, he went more than just too hard – he went _extra_ , way beyond what people’s expectations of him. He went too far to achieve a spot in the company where he could laugh along with the senior artists and be able to sit at the same table with them, he went above to be the company’s favorite rookie idol despite the backlash he received from everyone. He wouldn’t say it out loud but seeing the misery in the eyes of others when he got the attention of his superior which was considered a method to gain connections in the industry is quite enjoyable.

  


He’s once crazy enough to even crossed the line and started a relationship with a fellow senior artist that is way out of his league – at least at the time – and just give a big fuck you to everything. It went well until it went downright horrible that his partner chose to break the relationship because she can’t take his attitude anymore. He still side-eyed Taeyeon once in a while but that’s mostly past Baekhyun talking. He may do stupid things now like spoiling his album contents to his fans but he’s sane enough to know when not to misstep.

  


He believed he did every wrong thing enough in the past as he’s still in the company; a successful solo artist, in a superhero type of project group that’s supposed to dominate the western audiences, his original group still relevant and going strong despite the scandals or common mistreatment that he didn’t bat an eye to any more.

  


Things may be uncertain as fuck in this industry but he’s made it out alive from his stupid shenanigans as a fresh face back then and nothing an adult and mature Baekhyun can’t handle.

  


Kyungsoo always said that he spoke of things too soon. 

  


He interluded in it; said that it’s just another remedy of Kyungsoo trying to be wistful. Kyungsoo would roll his eyes and wished that karma won’t greet him anytime sooner. They would laugh after all that cause yet again, it’s just another funny attempt of Kyungsoo pretending to be as wise as Suho and everyone knew if something is to bring Byun Baekhyun down, it is anything but karma.

  


He did speak of things for way too soon though, he got to admit that.

  


No one can blame him for it, he damn well got his life under control at the age of 28 – a successor of a clothing brand, an artist of many awards, a dutiful son to his parents, and a wonderful friend to be with. Hell, he got tons of money and a big ass house, not to mention buying a car that would cost him more than the number of part-time jobs he took back when he’s still studying. Easy to say, he believed he had enough, at least in his context.

  


  


* * *

  


  


He didn’t know where this sudden urge comes from but he sure as hell isn’t comfortable with it. 

  


He tried to trace back the start of it all and while it may be a bit blurry but he remembered being drag by Sehun before to a fortune teller. He didn’t know why he agreed to it cause he’s aware of the amount of fortune both he and Sehun had combined but yeah, he had to appreciate the younger’s effort to get him out of his house. He can’t remember much of what Sehun got other than how he’s supposed to be successful at 50 – it’s a funny image to think of until he’s reminded that he’s probably dead by then – and thanked the older woman with a creepy expression that looked at him as if she can saw through all his bad deeds and sins.

  


“Someone going to come in your way and you will feel troubled handling them.”

  


Sehun only shrugged when they exchanged glances but proceeded to ask for an explanation from the woman.

  


This might be kind of personal and one that he wouldn’t utter to open-air but he did think that fortune tellers are kind of, not to be mean or anything, but they do come off a little bit... unrealistic? Maybe it’s just his way of thinking but they always looked a bit silly, not in a bad way – just, their mindset was constantly on the future that it made him wonder do they even think of the present.

  


“You won’t push them away for you have no courage to do so and you’ll seek them out till the end of the world.”

  


Her closing the door on their faces as soon as she said that didn’t help to change his perspectives on fortune tellers.

  


He surely didn’t take her words to his heart and even considered using them against his fans to allow them to talk about him for a while during his late-night driving live on Instagram. He told Chen what he thought of it as a married guy because, well, he’s the one living the life but Chen being the most reassuring and patient man when it comes to him complaining, just nicely said it word by word that the fortune teller might look stupid to him but he needs to consider her words as it might bring clue to the next chapter of his life.

  


Baekhyun wasn’t satisfied with the answer cause he’s not ready to start a family of any sort. After all, he’s thriving now and he’s sure he can go for more – greedy, that’s what he’s known for and he’s proud of it – but Chen only laughed and said that it may or may not be related to starting a family. The fact that it can be anything is harmful to him because he doesn’t think he’s ready for a sudden basket of a baby in his front door saying that he’s the dad with all the baby powder ready inside it.

  


Dramatic, but it’s classic Baekhyun.

  


At first, he thought it might be his beloved juniors consisting of one cat-loving artistic mind dancer, one fish-tank obsessed rapper, another tall and big hands giant of the group, or his lovely Mark that laughed to anything and everything. He’s quite sure it would be them cause those guys sure as hell had him running for them, quite literally, even though they can be insufferable at times but hey, they’re all smiles and happy tears around him so that’s a joy to his life.

  


He sure as hell isn’t ready for the ‘someone’ to be his supposed senior that he tried so hard to talk to before as a rookie – he’s not to blame because someone took practicing to new light – and he had to admit it came out as a surprised of his life when he felt the effects of that melodious laughter full force, cheeks so high and eyes so bright he had to look away sometimes. Funny, coming from a guy like him but he did have limits sometimes and he’s always borderline the limits every second spent with this certain someone.

  


Jongin assured him once that he’s charming enough to get whoever he wants, respect his choice of men and women alike who he might see once in a while when he visited his house, said that all he needs to do is use that cute smile of him and people would be falling for him. Said that as a Byun Baekhyun of all people shouldn’t need to use much of his charm because most people are still going to love him in the end.

  


Jongin wasn’t specific enough with his choice of words because most people in his dictionary apparently didn’t include a Lee Taemin.

  


The thing about Taemin is he’s as easy as trying to decipher a DaVinci Code and that’s a compliment as much as it is a curse. The guy is everything as much as he tried to be nothing and it’s such a pain in the ass trying to even think of charming a certain Taemin. Maybe this is what the old woman said about him having not enough courage for he is weak to the kind of Taemin.

  


Here’s another thing about Taemin, this is a fact coming from a foolish, idol rookie Baekhyun from nine years ago; Lee Taemin is nothing if not a boulder blocking the road. That can be taken literally with the way he’s always, _always,_ stuck in the practice room latching to the like of Jongin while they’re practicing.

  


(Baekhyun was ashamed to admit that he never really got to practice his already rusted dancing much seeing how the pair of dancers lightly moving their bodies to the beats of the music with the gossip of the trainees being their topic of the moment.)

  


As much as Baekhyun has heard of how Taemin always wishes to debut in EXO for the sake of hanging around guys his age and wanting to Growl with them, he knew well that Taemin is so much more than their 12 members boy group back then. It was quite apparent not only to the members of his group but to the company and probably the whole of South Korea that has seen the growth of their beloved child. That’s how Taemin is to him, to his members, to the entertainment industry, to the fans, and everyone. He’s a treasure of sort to the industry and very much a pleasure to everyone that can witness him in his full form. 

  


Baekhyun wouldn’t really say he put much effort in trying to get close to Taemin or his group in general because both of their groups always overlapped with one another and all of them are close. Friendships were built left and right and collaborations were made. It’s never a problem to develop a proper understanding with most of the members being in the same age and have trained together at least for a month or two in their training days. Even though Taemin is kind of a lost cause for the guy only stuck with Jongin and Sehun most of the time. He’s adored by everyone though, especially with Suho constantly asking about his diet when half of his members were struggling with food. 

  


No one complains though because Taemin was kind of adorable when he’s adored by the older ones and he relished in the fact that everyone just simply thought of him as a kid at the fresh age of 20.

  


Dealing with a younger Taemin might be easier but Baekhyun wouldn’t trade this version of Taemin that looks at him as if he hung the stars at the sky and easily ends all the bad in the world with his unnecessary jokes. He won’t ever understand the feeling of Suho back then but he’s familiar enough with the adoration that was simmering inside him.

  


He would kill himself before he ever admits that the adoration burns and it burns fast, it left him itching for something, urge him to reach out for something he had no control for. His hands sweaty every time the other ever come as close to touch him.

  


  


* * *

  


  


He had asked his group leader once about favoritism, had Suho looking at him weirdly for his question. 

  


“I swear to no favoritism but Jongdae’s the only one who hasn’t made me feel like wanting to kill myself so there’s your answer,” is Suho’s reply to him before proceeding to beg him not to tell this to Sehun with fear that the younger will sulk and spam his phone. Poor Suho, if only he knew how much more annoying the kid would be after he went to the military.

  


Baekhyun understands his point though – well, not to the Chen as his favorite because hey, he’s a joy to the world too – but yeah, he knew well that there wasn’t supposed to be favoritism in the first place especially if you’re in the group of great people, but is it really favoritism in his part? If we’re talking about favorites, there’s always Mark and his continuous laughter at literally nothing and Lucas being the cutest giant ever. There’s also Ten and the way he latched to everyone when he’s feeling pretty touch starved and Taeyong the ever-loving member that does just everything for him. There’s Jongin too he supposed, not that the kid matters when it comes to jumping on teasing him. 

  


He's not quite clear when he started seeing Taemin in a different light as in, not in the way a junior supposed to look at his senior nor the way you’re supposed to look at your fellow member’s best friend. He wasn’t aware of the transition on his point of view when he’s always, one way or another, look at Taemin like the other is blessed by God itself. He remembered when he’s so obsessed to get the attention of the man that he practiced the dance to Press Your Number when he’s not even a dancer in the first place. Not to mention Taemin passing by him like a wind when he imitated the dance at MAMA of 2016 being caught on camera. The embarrassment still stays with him until this day with the way both their fans spoke of it every time MAMA season came by but remembering the way Taemin apologized for it later, sheepish smile and shaking hands with an award tightly in his grasp is enough to last for years. It’s fine, Taemin is never one to pay attention to his surrounding with his attention span of a child anyway.

  


But yeah, you got his point.

  


  


* * *

  


  


He’s absolutely hopeless in times like this, this as in Taemin showing up to his front door with Jongin hot in his trail. 

  


“The manager hyung was begging me to check on you and here am I,” the still mute Baekhyun averted his gaze to the other guy, “He’s bored at home and want to tag along.” Both Taemin and Jongin smiled proudly before inviting themselves into the house with groceries in their hands leaving Baekhyun to stood alone to process the sudden guests. 

  


“Close the door, hyung. It’s still cold out there.”

  


Right, he’s very thankful for Taemin. 

  


“I didn’t agree to any of this,” He finally spoke after closing the door and found Jongin laying haphazardly on his couch while Taemin was rummaging the kitchen cabinets. “You wouldn’t agree to it anyway if we tell you beforehand.” Jongin reciprocated with legs on his coffee table that he cleaned just last night. “I would appreciate it if you get your legs off my table, you’re being annoying.”

  


He almost forgets the presence of another person in his house had it not been for Taemin suddenly appearing behind him. 

  


“Have you eaten, hyung?” 

  


Baekhyun had to resist the chill creeping up his body and pulled his sweater lower. The weather is still quite cold to be comfortable. “Is our Taemin asking for me? I haven’t eaten yet if you’re asking but I will do so if you want me to,” He said with a teasing tilt in his voice, suggestive eyebrows as Taemin just shook his head as he chuckled. He treasured this kind of reaction from the other so much when his laughter just filled up the space and make everything on sight so much brighter on a snowy day. He might or might not hear the laughter in his dream but that’s a story for another day. 

  


“I was thinking if you could cook for us. Jongin and I supposed to had lunch but the restaurant closed down because of the weather.” He said before sitting down on the floor, eyes roaming around for some entertainment. 

  


“And here I’m thinking you care about me.” He said, turning to his kitchen and checking what they had bought for him. “Tell Jongin to sleep in the room, he’s too much of a bother to wake up later and I don’t want to deal with him today.” He heard some hushed mumblings behind his back before a thud and the closing of the door as he fixed some quick dish.

  


“So, mind telling me why you’re here and not swimming through your sweats at the practice room,” He turned to Taemin sitting down by the island, hands busy fiddling with the apple they bought. “Some kids got scared of hearing someone in the room every day so they assumed it’s a ghost. I’m just trying to get the rumors down.” Taemin replied, eyes still not looking at him.

  


“Maybe if you stop dancing with no music at late hours people wouldn’t assume things.”

  


Taemin just smiled at that, choosing to wash the apple and eat it as he stood by the side and watched him cook. “You’ve gotten better at cooking; I still remember when all you manage to do is cook ramen that one time I went to your dorm.” 

  


Now, the other needs to stop talking as if he didn’t do a CPR on a cabbage on a national broadcast. Yes, Baekhyun watched it, just because he stumbled upon it due to the YouTube algorithm.

  


“Cut the act, Taemin.”

  


He didn’t like the silence that greets him and turned to his side to saw the other looking up, the apple left alone.

  


“What’s going on, what’s that face for?” Baekhyun questioned to which Taemin just shrugged at. “Just feeling a bit tired, I guess.” The other replied.

  


“Then go home and get some rest, why are you here?” He’s starting to feel uncomfortable with the weight of the other’s stare, “Don’t get me wrong, not that I don’t want you here but you don’t like coming out of your bed too if you’re tired. We’re both people of the same kind in case you need a reminder.”

  


Taemin just hummed as he went back to the living room, an unknown melody on the air as Baekhyun waited for his answer. 

  


“I don’t know, I thought it’ll be fun to come out once in a while then I heard Jongin going to visit you so I decided to join him. It’s nothing much really,” is all he got before the sound of Comedy Big League broke whatever it is that just happened.

  


Here’s the thing about Taemin, again, this man speaks in riddles – at least to him from what he noticed. There is no clear line whenever he speaks, especially in this kind of situation where there’s only him and no one else. It’s always like this whenever they’re alone, what with Taemin leaving him wondering what he did wrong in the past and the other just moving on to other things as if he didn’t just get a guy questioning his whole existence.

  


He’s tired of it, sick of being left alone to be a fool for someone who he didn’t know have the same sentiment as him or not. Sick of how Taemin found pleasure in making people confused – he wasn’t much of a saint to be talking like this but the other left even the greatest of people speechless and he’s done playing guess with the younger.

  


Fool, that’s what he is.

  


“I can hear you thinking,”

  


A really big fool on that. 

  


“Thank you for noticing.”

  


Lee Taemin, he swears to fucking God.

  


  


* * *

  


  


“What’s this sudden tension with you and Taemin? What happened while I slept the other day,” Jongin asked him in one fine day, the sound of sizzling meat and clanking glasses rippling through thin air. 

  


“Maybe if you stop sleeping so much you wouldn’t miss anything, and for the record, there’s always a tension between Baekhyun hyung and Taemin whenever they’re together.”

  


“Don’t be a smartass, kid.” Baekhyun patted Sehun’s back, putting a little bit more force than intended as the other guy started choking on his drink. “I agree with Sehun about you sleeping though,” Jongin only shrugged before diving back to grilling the meat.

  


Now that he thought of it, is it true that he and Taemin always had tension around them? Is it that obvious or is Sehun just messing with him again? 

  


He’s sure that he didn’t make himself a fool in front of his members yet when it comes to the subject of Taemin – even if he did, his members knew that it’s just his tendency to fool around with everyone. That’s how it’s always been, through his perspective at least.

  


He’s sure he watches his words and actions enough to make it natural, enough for his members to believe that no, Byun Baekhyun is not harboring feelings for someone he can’t attain.

  


  


* * *

  


  


Maybe he should work on his acting a bit more, his members aren’t strangers after all.

  


“I think you and Taemin look good together.”

  


Baekhyun turned around as soon as his character was found dead. He pursed his lips as the bolded word of DEFEAT blinked out on his computer screen.

  


“What did you say?”

  


“You heard me the first time, you’re always sensitive when you lose,” Chanyeol said, casually tapping his phone to whatever entertainment he decided to choose for this beautiful evening.

  


“No, I didn’t, I was focusing over the fact that I had consecutive loses for five games,” Baekhyun refuted, sighing as soon as he stood up to grab some water from his tableside. “I don’t know why I keep losing, I’m sure I play well enough.” 

  


“You only lost if something bothers you and I would hate to be annoying today so I wouldn’t spell it out to you. You know your problem.” 

  


Baekhyun stared at the ceiling before letting out another heavy sigh and laid down beside Chanyeol, his computer forgotten. 

  


“If you want to know what I think, I believe you’re good enough for him. The problem here is you keep looking at him like he’s some deity, he’s just like us. All of us witnessed the guy passed out in the practice room because he’s pushing himself too much.” 

  


“I like that about him,” Baekhyun mumbled slowly.

  


“Of course, you do, and you’ll like him even if he snorts out noodles from his nose.”

  


He made a face at Chanyeol, rolling his eyes as the other only ignored him.

  


“That’s disgusting, he doesn’t do that.” Chanyeol only turned to him a bit before dropping his phone and adjusted his position so he can lay back comfortably. “Come on, Baekhyun, we’ve seen the guy since he’s like, a kid, and you dare to say he won’t do that when he did worse than just that? You’re just whipped to turned a blind eye to the truth.”

  


Now Chanyeol is just annoying.

  


He’s not whipped, thank you very much. He’s just weighing the possibilities of Taemin doing disgusting things like that and no, it’s not even close to what Taemin would do. Maybe. Taemin did do some questionable things like eating snow back then but Baekhyun’s sure that he won’t do anything weird at a mature age.

  


Maybe. Whatever.

  


  


* * *

  


  


“What are you doing here?”

  


Baekhyun turned at the sound of the door opening and saw Taemin in his full glory, all dolled up with glittery makeup and messy hair probably from the amount of time he ran his hand through it. 

  


“Do you have a schedule before this?” Baekhyun proceeded to hand him his iced americano as soon as the engine started, the aircon still a bit too high for Baekhyun to comprehend. Something about Taemin not being able to handle heat or whatever it is. 

  


“You didn’t answer my question, I asked what you’re doing here.” Taemin refuted with a peculiar look in his eyes, his body almost a full turn with the way his seat belt stretched to hold him down. “Let me guess, you said you’ll pay for the dinner to Nam Euisoo if he let you join us, no?”

  


Baekhyun laughed at the flustered looks of his manager as Taemin shook his head at the poor guy.

  


“You’re so easy to be played with.”

  


It’s nothing serious but Baekhyun got to admit that he did bribe the guy. It’s not like it’s the first time anyway – there have been occasions where deals had to be made to get what he wanted. The guy knew too, if it’s not him then it’s got to be Jongin, there’s no in-between. Nam Euisoo just had to be lucky it’s him and not Jongin because he knew how many disasters the two friends will bring to him.

  


“Should we dine out or do you want me to cook for you?” Baekhyun asked as Taemin fixed his hair on the mirror, Americano halfway through the cup. 

  


“That’s kind of you but I’m kind of a diet now. I’ve been looking quite chubby lately.”

  


“Chubby is cute,” Taemin laughed at his words, “And I never understand the need for diet for you. How many times do I need to remind you that you’re too thin?”

  


“I know I’m cute, there’s no need to worry so much about me.” Baekhyun was grateful for the lack of lighting in the car or he would have to throw himself out of the window if Taemin decides to comment on the sudden flush of his face. 

  


  


* * *

  


  


“So, is this about Taemin?”

  


Baekhyun glared at Jongin for speaking out loud when their staffs were still in the room with them.

  


“I think this is good enough, can you leave us alone for a while?” Baekhyun requested as his hairstylist just shrugged her shoulders and spoke to the other staff. 

  


Oh well, it’s not like the staff won’t understand with the years of working for men like them. 

  


“Do we need to speak about it here of all place?” 

  


Here as in the waiting room right before their cues to perform. Surely Jongin could wait until they’re inside the van at least. He doesn’t like the idea of speaking his heart out with the booming music outside and the bustling sounds of staff walking outside the continent of their room. Jongin knows that he appreciated professionality first before anything else, he can’t understand why of all time does he need to bring up the topic of the other guy.

  


He won’t admit that it’s just him that’s kind of afraid of the consequences of this conversation and where it will take him to. He knew enough that Jongin isn’t that much of an asshole to expose the truth directly to Taemin but it’s his best friend, he doesn’t really fancy the idea of not getting the approval of Taemin's best friend for life and his member of all that. 

  


“You’ve been quiet for too long for it to not be serious. You usually asked our opinions about your love life but everyone said that you looked troubled.”

  


Jongin was just looking at him with something akin to concern in his eyes which made him sighed in relief. At least he knows this is not going to start with a fight.

  


“I’m just saying that if you’re having a problem sorting out your feelings you can always speak to us about it. No one’s going to judge you just because you looked at Taemin differently.” Jongin proceeded to say.

  


“Suho will judge me really bad, excuse you.” 

  


“Except for him, of course.” They laughed at the thought of Suho's widened eyes if he gets to know the truth.

  


“Anyway hyung, it doesn’t hurt for you to try. I think you guys look good together.” Jongin tried to offer a smile which only came out like a wince. 

  


“That’s easy for you to say unless you have to deal with the rollercoaster emotions yourself. Swear to God, knowing the guy for years doesn’t change the fact that he’s too much to crack,” Baekhyun said. “It’s not like he feels the same anyway.”

  


“That’s the thing about you, stop assuming what others feel. All you do is assumed things then expect the worst of outcomes. Nothing good will come out with that mindset of yours. You don’t know Taemin, he’s unexpected, yes, but he won’t make fun of you for having silly thoughts about him. You see how he is too, knows that he’s too kind to begin with.”

  


That much is true.

  


Taemin is too good for this world. He’s the guy that found beauty in unexpected ways. Baekhyun has always admired the way he viewed the world and how he managed to work up wonders – let it be in a professional state or just his daily lives – but he like that about Taemin. Like that he’s so thoughtful of everyone and tried his best to make everyone comfortable despite all the things other have spoken of him. Growing up young and raised in so much love from his family and members do make him a wonderful man today.

  


“I don’t think I’m deserving enough for him.”

  


For Taemin deserved so much instead of a guy that can’t even make out his mind when it comes to his life, a guy that’s constantly in need of something that always led him to made bad decisions, a guy that barely have any confidence in speaking out his love to the person he loves.

  


“That’s what everyone said until they tried.”

  


  


* * *

  


  


“I need to tell you something.”

  


This is a bad idea. It’s the stupidest choice he ever made in his life. He shouldn’t get too affected by Jongin’s words. 

  


He’s not thinking right to be standing in front of Taemin’s door at this late hour, make up still intact on his face and stage fit still stuck on his body like a second skin due to all the sweating from the way he ran from the recording studio to his house and drove to this place as quick as he can.

  


Baekhyun can saw that Taemin was woken up from his frantic bell rings and phone notifications if the frown on his face isn’t enough indication.

  


“It’s late, hyung. What are you doing here?”

  


Taemin’s voice was rough from the sleep and Baekhyun started to feel the guilt eating off him because he knew how much Taemin had trouble sleeping lately.

  


God, he’s so stupid, literally what the fuck is he doing here.

  


“I need to tell you something,” Baekhyun huffed out a shaky breath when Taemin only pulled him inside when the cold air started to creep up to their bodies.

  


“I’ve heard you the first time but can’t it wait until tomorrow? Nothing can be too serious right.”

  


_No, I can’t wait until tomorrow because I might probably have to erase myself from this world if I don’t say this now. It’s now or never._

  


“Well, what is it that you wanted to say. I still need to catch up on my sleep–”

  


“I love you.”

  


Be damned romantic confessions. Might as well just go for it.

  


“I love you. I think I have been for a long time but I just realized it recently. I’ve just come to terms with it because I don’t want to confuse it with admiration cause that’s all I know when it comes to you. I admired you since long ago, when you’re nothing but a senior artist of mine despite being younger than me, when you’re nothing but a name on everyone’s lips, a person that exists within the wind even though I have been in the company for months.”

  


“Hyung–”

  


“No, let me speak. I want to let it all out so I won’t have to regret this and kill myself later. Anyway, yeah, I love you. I think I do from the first day you came into our practice room and bonded with Jongin. I don’t understand it back but I’m glad that I can put a face to the name I heard in every corner. I didn’t tell you enough but I actually did enjoy your company when you decided to annoy our members whenever you found the time. You aren’t the funniest person but I do like it when you hung out with us back then. Still do, though.

  


What I’m trying to say is I have realized that I love you and I hate the fact that I can’t live up to your standard. I hate that I know how much you deserved someone that is so much better than me but I’m too selfish to admit it because I want you for myself. Stupid, I know, how can I limit the Lee Taemin for my own needs? That’s not how it works but I still want you. I hate myself the most when I think of you with another person and feel like I could be better than them when I’m sure I can’t. I hate that I’m so selfish at the thought of you and your presence alone that I’m ready to risk everything else for you.”

  


Baekhyun took a deep breath and closed his eyes when he’s done.

  


What happened from now can either be really good or just horrible and he can’t say he like it that much. He just hopes that Taemin is at least nice enough to not delete his number after this cause it’s embarrassing enough that he’s here at his place, he wouldn’t be able to face the younger anywhere if this goes wrong.

  


Taemin was just blinking as he looked down, probably judging the hell out of his stupidity. 

  


“Sorry, I know this is all stupid but I just need to get that out. I’ll get away from your sight if that’s what you wish, which sounds funny cause we’re still in one group at the end of the day but yeah. I’m sorry, I’m being an idiot.”

  


Baekhyun should just shut up at this point. Minseok would be mad if he knew that he still made jokes during serious occasions. 

  


The silence that stretched over them was enough to answer for him. Of course, what was he thinking? Why would he even thought that someone like Taemin would accept a mess like him?

  


“Yeah, I’ll just go. Sorry again for bothering you.”

  


“I love you too.”

  


_Stop assuming what others feel._

  


“I mean, I don’t know what else to say about this but I do love you too.”

  


_All you do is assumed things then expect the worst of outcomes. Nothing good will come out with that mindset of yours._

  


“Please say something, I’m not good with this thing.”

  


Baekhyun must’ve looked like a total fool standing still like a statue in the middle of the living room to Taemin. No one can blame him though; he’s still trying to process whatever it is that just came out of the younger’s mouth now.

  


“I don’t know if I should thank you or kiss the living hell out of you now.” 

  


Then there it is, Taemin’s laugh that he would fight the world for coming to the scene. He could notice the happiness with the way his eyes radiated a whole universe as he looked back at him, cheeks high and nose scrunching. 

  


“The kiss can wait for later, I still need to sleep and you need to change soon or else it’s going to be annoying. You stink too.”

  


This is how it’s always been with Taemin. Everything comes off easy and natural for them. He doesn’t know why he needs to complicate things when things have always been nothing but a soft breeze on passing for them, nothing but little waves crashing along the rocks, clear blue sky with blinding sunlight, and warm sands under their feet.

  


This is just another usual conversation for them – something they can smile and laugh along to in the future, something they will reminisce and think of in every passing day, just like always. 

  


Nothing is certain in this industry but he’s sure enough that nothing much won’t change between him and Lee Taemin. 

  


And if he woke up with the brightest smile and decided to call Jongin to say how thankful he is to his words and made the younger question him in the early morning then it’s no one’s business.

  


  


  


**Author's Note:**

> drop your comments and kudos if you enjoy it!


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